CONVERSATIONS WITH ANNETTE
Audio #01
MAKE PREDICTIONS, NOT RESOLUTIONS!
Intro: This is Tina Cook greeting you from
Secret2LoveYourLife.com where we inspire you to make life
changing breakthroughs.
Welcome to ‘CONVERSATIONS WITH ANNETTE’.
Annette du Toit is the leading Mind-Body Wellness coach in South
Africa, a
speaker, an Internationally Accredited Louise Hay Master
Trainer, Reiki
Master, EFT practitioner and co-founder of our website
Secret2LoveYourLife.com.
Our topic for today is:
MAKE NEW YEAR’S PREDICTIONS, NOT NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS!
This sounds fantastic! Annette let’s start straight away.
Why are we motivated to make New Year’s Resolutions in the first
place?
Annette: Well Tina, I think that the first thing is that it is
traditional – we’ve been doing it all our lives and we feel we SHOULD be making
New Year’s
Resolutions.
And …
Most people also want to make a difference in their lives – they
want to
change.
They want to exercise regularly.
They want to - loose weight.
They want to - quit smoking or drinking.
They want to - get out of debt.
Some of them even want to start a new business.
But keeping these New Year's resolutions can be more than a
little
challenging.
Most people don’t even bother to make New Year’s resolutions any
more
because they have become despondent because they never stick to
them,
which make them feel horribly guilty, that they are a failure
and they can
never complete anything successfully.
Tina: You know I read somewhere that over 80% of New Year’s
resolutions
are history within the first 30 days of making them and another
10% in the
following 30 days fall by the wayside. So we are in good company
here.
So that means that only 10% of people actually keep their New
Year’s
resolutions.
Hey Annette! Throw some light on the subject! Please help us
here. What’s
the secret?
Annette: The problem is wide spread.
Just look at the health clubs and gyms. From January 2 they are
packed for
the first week. You battle to get onto a cardio machine. But go
two weeks
later...and the gym is half empty.
For me the reasons are obvious.
Firstly, there are unconscious ‘counter resolutions’ within us…
and until we
discover what they are we will not fulfill our new year’s
resolutions.
FOR INSTANCE – I say I want to quit smoking and immediately the
little
voice in my head comes up with a ‘counter resolution’ and it
says ‘NO! –
NO! - you can’t give up smoking, it helps you to relax’. OR, ‘it
helps you
deal with stress’, OR ‘you tried it before and it’s too
difficult’!
So that ‘little voice’ is actually sabotaging your New Year’s
Resolutions.
The Second reason we don’t keep our New Year’s resolutions, is
that they
are not backed by the right mental preparation and conditioning.
Most
resolutions are made on impulse and are not well thought out.
So you end up feeling deprived and hard done by instead of
feeling inspired
and empowered to take action. Think of loosing weight – most
people feel
deprived! No more chocolate!
We also have a tendency to overestimate what we can do. If you
want to
lose 30 pounds and your New Year’s resolution is to do it in 3
months, you
are setting yourself up for failure. However if you say ‘I'll
lose 30 pounds by
the end of the year….’ Chances are that you will.
And the third reason why people fail to achieve their New Year’s
Resolutions, is that they are primarily based on quick fixes -
quick fixes,
which are more about what people, DON’T want in their lives
rather than on
what they DO want to BE, DO and HAVE.
Q. So Annette how do we do this thing differently? How do we make
2008 the
best year of our life?
Annette: Firstly, you throw out New Year’s Resolutions – simply
throw them
out and put them to rest once and for all: There are many more
effective
and fun ways to bring about change:
One of them is to Make New Year’s predictions…
Tina: It’s a whole change of emphasis.
Annette: Yes, it’s a different way of thinking – you see the
word ‘resolution’
comes from a patriarchal system of ‘I am not good enough and
therefore I
should change (and then we keep criticizing ourselves and feel
guilty when
we cannot keep our resolutions).
The word ‘prediction’ on the other hand is a statement or claim
that a
particular event will occur in the future. It gives you the
opportunity to
choose what you really, really WANT to BE, DO and HAVE and then …
YOU generate powerful and inspirational INTENTIONS to achieve
your
predictions. It is like notifying the universe of the shape of
things to come
- Way more fun!
The time of intense struggle and relying upon will power,
resolve and
persistence is over and it's time to learn to live a lot more
effortlessly and
purposefully.
And you don’t have to wait for the 1st of January!! Every day of
every year
is the 1st day of your life - a new year! A new start. And you
can set
Intentions for yourself every day!
Tina: But how do I get past that little voice in the head?
Annette: That’s a very good question. I would say START with
having a
GOOD RIDDANCE DAY! Get rid of your old self-sabotaging
conditioning and
programming about New Year’s Resolutions, Negative belief
systems that I
am not good enough, I am a failure, the ‘no pain, no gain’
belief, that
without effort and struggle, you will most certainly fail, etc,.
Get rid of old
resentments and anger, your destructive and damaging Actions FOR
INSTANCE: DO you abuse your body? Are you living above your means? Are you carrying Shame for
something
you did in the past? And anything else that you want to dump and
get RID
OF IT FOR GOOD AND FOR ALL!
Often we start off the year with a spring clean. We clean out
the garage,
clothes cupboards, our office – so what about spring-cleaning
our emotional
issues? There are many ways to do this – through regular
meditation, or
joining a support group or attending a transformational
workshop.
Naturally, I’d love you to join one of my workshops and if you
can’t then
find one near you. Just do it!
It is so important to get rid of your self-sabotaging
emotional baggage
that you have been carrying – just set your self free.
Forgive the people you need to forgive including yourself and
then make a deliberate CHOICE to change. It is a choice.
Once you have made your choice you need to make a Commitment and
a
promise to yourself.
If you are not committed and you don’t make that promise to
yourself, it is not possible to succeed in moving your life forward – you stay
stuck exactly
where you are.
The greatest promise you'll ever keep is the promise you make to
yourself ... It's your own personal test of integrity –
thinking, saying and
doing the same thing. When you're out of integrity, you're
fragmented and
lack harmony in your life physically, mentally and spiritually.
Tina: Annette, that sounds amazing. That makes so much sense and
that
clarify so many things.
Annette: Yes, COMMITMENT is also a choice and you decide that
you want
to be prosperous and abundant. Or you decide that you want to
loose
weight or start a business.
The Latin word for decision is ‘decidere’ which means ‘to kill
off any other
alternatives’. The definition for commitment is: ‘To devote
oneself
unreservedly.’
So when you say ‘I am truly committed to creating this end
result, you are
devoting yourself unreservedly to being willing to go all the
way, giving
100% of all you’ve got to achieve your result.
You have to do whatever it takes, regardless of how long it
takes, without
any excuses, reasons why it can’t. No ifs and buts, no maybes.
Regardless
of risks involved and sacrifices. In spite of fear, doubt and
worry,
uncertainty and inconvenience. In spite of discomfort.
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
COMMITMENT requires unconditional focus and courage. It is the
act of
binding yourself intellectually and emotionally to a course of
action.
COMMITMENT sets you free. Once you commit, the universe will
pull out all
stops to support you and you no longer have to have endless mind
chatter
as to whether you do it or not do it, and on and on.
John D. Rockefeller put it so well: ‘The road to happiness lies
in two simple
principles: find what it is that interests you and that you can
do well, and
when you find it, put your whole soul into it -- every bit of
energy and
ambition and natural ability you have.’
Now that you are committed to change, it’s time to CLARIFY your
New
Year’s INTENTIONS.
SO you say you want to exercise regularly.
What does regularly mean? Once a week? Twice a week? 3 times?
What kind of exercise is it going to be? Maybe going to gym
doesn’t blow
your hair back… so is it going to be yoga, or Pilates, or Nia or
belly
dancing?
And if it is the gym – will it be weight lifting, water
aerobics, spinning? And
only after you have done this clarification exercise will you be
ready to
make your New Year’s INTENTIONS.
And once you have clarity, make it your business to learn ALL
there is to
know about The Natural Laws Of The Universe and specifically:
The Law of Attraction,
The Law of Deliberate Creation and
The Law of Detachment.
Tina: Annette, a lot of people have seen the movie The Secret
and know
about The Law of Attraction – that is very well portrayed in the
movie, but
for those who haven’t, just tell us what The Law Of Attraction
is all about.
Annette: The first thing I want to say is that The Law of
Attraction is NOT
a ‘new-age’ concept as many people choose to believe. It is a
natural law
that is at work in your life all of the time whether you know
about it or
believe it or not. Learning how to intentionally apply it can
change your life
forever!
The Law of Attraction states that like energy attracts like
energy, like a
magnet. Thought is energy.
You attract to you the essence of whatever you are predominantly
thinking
about. If you are consistently thinking about wealth and
prosperity, your
results will reflect that. By the same token, if you are
consistently thinking
about your terrible financial situation and battling to pay all
your bills, your
results will equally reflect that.
You also need to become aware of your fears especially, because
what you
fear you will attract! If you fear rejection, disapproval, or
abandonment –
guess what? You will attract being rejected, disapproved of and
abandoned.
Tina: The second law, Annette, that you mentioned was
the Law of Deliberate Creation. So tell us about that one.
Annette: Okay. The Law of Deliberate Creation is about
deliberately
applying your thoughts.
You are the creator of your own experience. What you are
predominantly
thinking about and focusing on – with emotional intent and
feeling, you will
create. When you are dissatisfied with something in your life –
say your
career … and you deliberately modify your focus from - I hate my
job, to - I
have a stunning new job, paying me a handsome salary with great
prospects for advancement – you are changing your point of
attraction and
will receive a different more satisfying result.
SO, focusing intentionally is what deliberate creation is all
about. And there
is great satisfaction in deliberately creating wonderful
outcomes. You have
total control over all the physical trappings of your New Year’s
Intentions.
Tina: So the third law you mentioned, Annette, is the Law of
Detachment.
How does that support us with our New Year’s Intentions?
Annette: This Law compliments the process of creating your
intention.
It means you let go of the outcome – the end result. Just stop
worrying
about it. And you get into the FEELING OF HAVING IT!
So if it is money that you want, you get off the money, improved
health,
you get off the health. You actually start to FEEL what it would
FEEL like to
BE healthy. And you start to FEEL what it would FEEL like when
you have
the million Bucks in the bank.
Your focus is the FEELING that having the money will give you –
the feeling
of LOVE, JOY, PEACE, FULFILLMENT, GRACE, LIGHT HEARTEDNESS,
EMPOWERMENT, PEACEFULNESS, WELL-BEING, PURPOSEFULNESS,
FREEDOM!!
Your willingness to give it all up will lead to you having it
all.
It is like ordering a meal at a restaurant; do you run to the
kitchen every
few minutes to check on whether they are cooking your meal? With
complete faith and trust in the universe, everything will
manifest in divine
right order. You just need to trust. And this higher energy
force is always
co creating with and through you for your greatest good and the
greatest
good of all concerned.
If you are attached to your outcome, you will project negative
emotions of
fear, doubt, or craving which actually attracts the opposite of
your desire.
You are operating from a position of worry, fear and doubt
rather than
serenity, trust and faith. Banish all your doubts and fears and
enter into
the realm of uncertainty.
Uncertainty and the unknown is also the field of all
possibilities or what I
call - YOUR ZONE OF PURE POTENTIAL. It is exciting, scary,
mysterious,
and loaded with possibilities and always open to the creation of
new
opportunities.
Tina: That sounds an awesome way to start any new day or any new
year
Annette. So how does gratitude fit into this?
Annette: Gratitude is actually a very important component of The
Law of
Attraction. If you want to gain huge benefits from applying the
lessons of
The Law of Attraction, you need to cultivate an attitude of
gratitude and
appreciation.
Gratitude is actually what confirms the Intention Process. We
know that our
past intentions have come true. When we express our gratitude,
we're
saying thank you to the Universe for bringing us what we've
asked for. We
also acknowledge our connection with universal power. The
Intention
Process has come full circle starting with an intention,
manifesting in
reality and ending in gratitude, which makes us feel good - and
it makes us
feel successful.
Tina: So that’s the outcome that everybody really, really wants
to feel.
They want to feel successful at whatever it is that they have
set
themselves as their intention for this day, for this month, for
this year. You
really want to feel good about it and that is a fabulous and
stunning way to
end our conversation. Thank you Annette. Can you just summarize
for us
the main points.
Annette: TO SUMMARIZE OUR CONVERSATION
Throw Out Your New Year’s Resolutions
Make New Year’s predictions
Have a GOOD RIDDANCE DAY a spring clean plus forgive the people
you
need to forgive including yourself.
Make a deliberate CHOICE to change.
Make a Commitment and a promise to yourself.
CLARIFY your New Year’s INTENTIONS by defining what you really,
really
want to Be, Do and Have.
Make your New Year’s Intentions.
Learn ALL there is to know about The Natural Laws Of The
Universe.
Specifically:
The Law of Attraction,
The Law of Deliberate Creation and
The Law of Detachment.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude and appreciation.
So let's start this year differently. Take a quantum leap
forward and make
2008 your year of profound commitment and transformation.
Tina: Thank you Annette, that is very thought provoking and its
given us a
whole new take on New Year’s Resolutions.
Just to remind you, if you haven’t downloaded the handout yet,
Annette
has summarized these points in a handout which is available on
our
website www.Secret2LoveYourLife.com. Just go to the Freebee
section and
you will see ‘Conversations with Annette’ and under that you
will find the
handout summarizing the points that Annette’s made today.
This is Tina Cook and Annette du Toit greeting you and saying
goodbye for
now from www.Secret2LoveYourLife.com where we inspire you to
make life
changing breakthroughs and inviting you to join us next time
when we have
‘Conversations with Annette’.
Copyright 2008 Paradigm Shift Trainings
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